Man, when it rains it pours. My trading slump is absolutely epic at this
point. I can’t even remember the last
winner I had – we’re literally talking weeks.
I took a few days to get back in sync with the market without taking a
trade, but guess what? When I started
trading again, I kept losing. I’ve been
so frustrated with my trading I actually deleted my trading log because I
couldn’t take seeing negative trade after negative trade after negative trade. Probably the most amazing thing about this
slump is that we have been in an ideal market for pulling tons of positive
pips. I trade at an institute called
Fx365i and the instruction we receive is spot on – many traders were pulling
lots of positive trades last week. In
fact, one trader was up 500 pips just last week! Man, I can’t tell you how much
it hurts to suck this bad at something that means so much to me.
My frustration is starting to take a
toll on me. My performance at work is
clearly less than ideal. I’m trying to
focus, but the overall stress is definitely making it hard to focus for any
sustained period of time. Until
yesterday, I had done a reasonably good job of not getting angry in other parts
of my life, but last night I started to snap.
I was already late in getting to bed (my own undisciplined fault) when I
realized I promised my wife I would vacuum out the cracks of the couch. It was literally a two minute task and I was
pissed as if that two minutes was going to make a difference when I was already
an hour late (yeah, that’s logical…).
Then, I got pinched by the vacuum tool I was using and started swearing
as if I had been shot in the arm by a 9mm.
I angrily vacuumed the couch (for 90 seconds). Then, as I was wrapping up the cord, I banged
my thumb and started slamming the vacuum cleaner on the ground like an
idiot. Not exactly mature behavior.
So of course I decided to set my alarm
later than usual in order to make up for going to bed over an hour behind
schedule. The next morning I get to
Fx365i 30 minutes behind schedule. I’m
doing my pre-session and can clearly see the market is moving. As I’m measuring some average price lines,
LaCurtis (the institute’s lead instructor) points out that there is a good pull
back to enter the trade. It’s truly a beautiful
set up. I mean, this is EXACTLY what we
look for. Great pressures, the razor was
strong on all time frames. Really
nice.
So, do I take the trade? Of course not. I keep taking my pre-session measurements
thinking I’m going to see a better pull back.
By the time I look again, I have missed the damn trade. This is so infuriating. My own lack of discipline from the night
before caused me to miss a super easy 20+ pip trade. In addition, my lack of paying close
attention to the pressures (the buying pressure on the 15 was over 500, meaning
we probably wouldn’t see a pull back super close to the 2min trend break),
caused me to miss this incredibly easy trade.
Pretty much everyone at the institute today got the trade and pulled
enough pips to make their goal for the day… but not me. Man, talk about feeling like a total fu**ing
moron… again. Like I said, it hurts. It hurts bad.
So… I have decided to start this trading
journal / blog. Actually I have been
meaning to do a blog for quite some time now.
My initial plan was to do a youtube channel. My channel has been set up for some time, but
I haven’t used it. I guess I’m more
comfortable writing out this blog, so that’s where I’m going to start. Hopefully it will grow into a YouTube channel
also.
The crazy thing about this horrific
soul-sucking slump is that I feel like I’m actually starting to see the market
more clearly than ever before. I think it’s
probably adding to my frustration and anger because it’s obviously not
translating into anything remotely resembling success.
To add to everything, I am now part of
a beta test group for Fx365i’s new Smart Money software. The few people that have been using the new
software prior to the beta group have raved about it, so I’m excited. I’m also very nervous because as I said, I
feel like I’m starting to see things more clearly in the old software and am about
to bust out of this mega-slump in a big way.
So why am I doing the beta test? First of all, I want to give back to the
institute whenever I can. From the
owners to the instructors to the best traders in the class to the newest students,
everyone at the institute forms a great community. If I have a chance to give back, it is truly
the least I can do. I must admit, my
current finances are extremely tight, so I am definitely nervous about whatever
new fees are going to be associated with the new Smart Money Profile (SMP)
after the beta testing is over. However,
even if I love the SMP, but am financially forced to go back to the Wealth
Smart trading suite, at least I will feel like I had the opportunity to help
contribute to the ongoing success of Fx365i.
In the end, the Wealth Smart software is still outstanding and there are
people consistently pulling pips (even 500 pips in a week!!!), so there are no
excuses.
Well, this has been a rambling start,
but at least I have finally put something together. I look forward to continuing to put my
thoughts together. I believe putting
myself and my trading out there will help me and I hope it helps anyone who
reads. Comments and thoughts are always
welcome.
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